Countdown

It's MARCH! AND ITS FRIDAY!!!

The spring semester is just about half way over all though it doesn't feel that way because of the slow start we had due to snow. I have a few countdowns that you all might think are interesting to know (especially the last one)....

There are 16 days until the first day of spring!




There are only 15 days until SPRING BREAK (or reading week, I prefer the former)




There are only 70 Days until the end of the semester!




And here we go drum roll please... there are only 805 Days until Friday May 17th The projected day of my MDiv Graduation!!



OK so I may have gotten a little out of control with the graduation countdown thing, but HEY at least now I know!!!

Well I'm signing off for now... hope you ALL have a blessed and relaxing weekend!

final post LOVE IS:

dear readers
I apologize for the lack of posts the last 2 weeks or so. Today is the last day of February and so this will be my last post about "LOVE IS..." so I will leave you with a few pictures to look at and ponder.



May you always know that YOU are LOVED!



and I pray you NEVER FORGET:

LOVE is:...

Well I must say that I am impressed with myself. This is the third blog this week. and once again its ALL about LOVE! I think once the semester really hits hard I won't be blogging as much...

Tonight I am reflecting on African American History and how they have played a vital role in my life. My son is black. If it weren't for his father (my ex husband) I would not appreciate black history as much as I do today. I also find it very, very important to keep educating N on his background and history.

So tonight I share a quote from the wonderful, late, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.



It is a very fine line to walk between power and love!



only one thing can drive out hate...love... humph maybe instead of hating our jobs or our laundry or our homework, or the mundaneness of life we should figure out how to put some LOVE in there?!! Lord Knows I NEED to Love more!!



AWW KITTY CATS!!



yea I just had to throw this one in here! I really do love Black People! I love hearing their stories and how each of them are unique and I love, love, love, love, love that Jesus loves us ALL, and that in heaven we're ALL family!!

~B

LOVE is:...

Love is:
Well this is my second blog for the week, and its still ALL ABOUT LOVE!

Here are lyrics to one of my most absolute favorite songs in the whole world! It is by an artist named JJ Heller and if you listen to Christian radio you have most likely heard this song several times in the last six months or so...

He cries in the corner where nobody sees
He's the kid with the story no one would believe
He prays every night, "Dear God won't you please...
Could you send someone here who will love me?"

Who will love me for me
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me
'Cause nobody has shown me what love
What love really means

Her office is shrinking a little each day
She's the woman whose husband has run away
She'll go to the gym after working today
Maybe if she was thinner
Then he would've stayed
And she says...

Who will love me for me?
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me?
'Cause nobody has shown me what love, what love really means

He's waiting to die as he sits all alone
He's a man in a cell who regrets what he's done
He utters a cry from the depths of his soul
"Oh Lord, forgive me, I want to go home"

Then he heard a voice somewhere deep inside
And it said
"I know you've murdered and I know you've lied
I have watched you suffer all of your life
And now that you'll listen, I'll tell you that I..."

I will love you for you
Not for what you have done or what you will become
I will love you for you
I will give you the love
The love that you never knew

WOW those are some powerful words. The words alone do not do it justice. Here is a link to the official music video of the song: Love Me For Me. I encourage you ALL to watch it, even if you have seen it before, and reflect in the awesome, powerful, wonderful, amazing LOVE of our God,Creator, Father/Mother, whatever you call God. God DOES Love ME! God DOES Love YOU! now wipe away the tears and get back to whatever it was you were doing before you stumbled across this blog...! for me I will get back to my homework!

Stay Tuned for more "LOVE is:" this month!!

~B

LOVE is:...

Okay so I've realized that the past few blogs of mine have been kind of downers so I've decided to pump things up a bit. For the month of February I will be posting all about LOVE! I have friends that despise valentines day, and I've been there so I feel 'em! but I've also had very nice valentines days and so I'm kinda 'eh' about the day I really couldn't care less... It's like Christmas WAY over mediatized (and Yes I think I just made up that word)...

So I will start with a quote from one of my favorite authors/theologians:

"Your life and my life flow into each other as wave flows into wave, and unless there is peace and joy and freedom for you, there can be no real peace or joy or freedom for me. To see reality--not as we expect it to be but as it is--is to see that unless we live for each other and in and through each other, we do not really live very satisfactorily; that there can really be life only where there really is, in just this sense, love." --Frederick Buechner--

now instead of thinking of this 'you' he refers to here as your significant other...think of it in the context of "love your neighbor as yourself"



woah wowzer That'll preach baby!!!!

I hope to post at least once a week, keep lookin out for some more love from this big momma!!!!

~B

2 H A R D years!

Well its Jan 9th well into the New Year... welcome 2011... Nate and I didn't do much to celebrate, but we did make cookies and watch Max and Ruby's New Year episode.


The title of my blog tonight is 2 H A R D years.

For the last 2 years I have had a hard time in life! (and yes I know there are people out there who have a harder life) The last weekend of Jan 2009 my little sister and mother bought me and Nate a 1 way ticket from Dallas to Kansas City, I had enough of the emotionally/verbally/spiritually abusive marriage that I was in and finally got up the guts to leave. THAT WAS H A R D! I cried more than I think I have ever cried in my life.

I graciously lived with my dad/step-mom from Feb 2009-Oct 2009 That was HARD I know there are a lot of parents who do not want their adult kids to live with them, but please let me tell you this, it is hard to go from 100% independent for 4+ years to living back with your parents!!!! HARD!!!!

In September 2009 I started Graduate School at Saint Paul School of Theology because I believe with my heart that God who holds perfect power has called me into ordained ministry in the United Methodist Church and with out a seminary degree one (of my age) cannot get ordained. that decision was HARD because I did not know how I was going to provide for myself or my son while going to school full time.



School seemed to be okay, don't get me wrong after almost 5 years out of school it was hard to get my head around all the reading the grammar (which is still horrible). School for me is kind of like a 'normalcy' with all the crazy going on in my life. I can always depend that I have homework to do (mainly reading), classes to take, and a school family who cares...

My divorce was final Aug 30th 2010. Which included me driving 1000+ miles in 48 hours to appear in court in Dallas TX. THAT WAS HARD!! it was HARD to see my TX family and to say goodbye to them they mean SO much to me! I cried a lot on that trip.

I'm not sure what is harder, a broken heart, recovering from emotional abuse OR going to school full time and being a single mom. Or knowing that my son has not seen his father in almost 2 years. Yes his father hurt me, but that does not mean that he should not have a relationship with his son.

I had a successful fall semester with an A- and 2 B's the best semester yet. I face 2011 being laid off from my steady church job at the end 2010... I have been blessed by keeping a part time job on campus where I attend school, I will be able to pick up some extra hours this spring and hopefully 'make it'. It will be HARD!

I tried dating...went on like 6 dates, maybe I thought having a 'man' would make me feel better about myself, would heal my broken heart... well a good friend (if she reads this she knows who she is) recommended a book entitled "On My Own: The Art of Being a Woman Alone" by Florence Falk. I haven't read it all but just the beginning of this book has allowed me to be confident in Who I am, and WHOSE I am. Having a man does not make me complete. Does that mean I am out of the dating game? nope. (So hey if you think you can set me up with someone bring it on)But it does mean that I'm not scared of being alone, and that when I feel lonely is when I need to embrace my first love...God.

What does 2011 hold for me? I do not know. I do know I still have 2.5 years left of school so i'm not leaving Saint Paul School of Theology anytime soon. I also know that my Son needs his Momma to be his mother, his father for a bit longer.

Everyday I face opposition. There are people out there who think I am crazy for doing all 'this'. There are people out there that think I should have reconciled with my ex-husband. (because Christians don't get divorced). I face opposition within my own heart because 'THIS' is SO H A R D! Pray for me, pray for us. Believe in me, believe in us. I am not perfect by any means. I have learned a lot about myself and I know that there is a lot of room for me to improve in my education, spiritual life, and parenting.

I however remain to have HOPE. HOPE in who/what God has called me to become. I have hope that this calling/career will give the stability that I long to provide for my Son. So when you pray for us, pray that the HOPE will ring LOUD in my ears when this year gets hard, as the past 2 years have...

some Christmas pics

if you haven't already seen them on Facebook, here are a few Christmas pictures. N had a great Christmas. now on the 3rd of Jan. as I write this I am grateful that I've had the time to rest, read, clean, and do a little bit of playing on my Christmas break... i'm feeling like it will be another fight with insomnia tonight so I may post another blog a little later...


cookie decorating, N loved it!!


look at all those presents! dont worry they were not all for Nate! He did get the 2 big ones tho!! I'm SO blessed to have been able to give those to him, err I mean Santa!!



this is one of my favorites from the pics that N's teacher took of us! she's a photographer in her 'off' times!!

Well I hope ya'll had a blessed christmas! and I hope that this new year brings lots of happiness, few tears, and a TON of hope to you and yours!!!

~B